The mortgage was late...again. The bills were coming in faster than I could pay them, an all too familiar pit in my stomach began to manifest and that same old money pattern began to arise.
3 years previously, we were facing one of the most challenging financial periods of our lives. A 2-income family with 3 kids, over $100K in student loan debt, an attempted file for bankruptcy and a little white paper with a "Date of Auction" laid on it as our sweet home was facing foreclosure.
It got REAL, real quick....how was THIS our life?? We managed to work with the mortgage company and scrounge up enough money (as we always did) to save our precious home. Over the next few years there were many, many moments of crying as I sat in my parked car in the driveway... wondering how to keep the electricity from getting cut off and how to put food on the table for another day. Constantly negotiating with the cell phone company so that our water could get turned back on. Receiving notes from USPS because there wasn't enough room in our mailbox for more mail to be delivered. They probably assumed we were just out of town, when in reality I was too afraid to check the mail. I was afraid to see the bills, the notices, I was afraid to answer the phone and when I was able to muster up the courage to actually speak to the collectors, the conversation always ended with me in tears, anxiety flooding my body and feelings of failure.
All of this was happening in divine timing, intertwined during the period in my life that I began my spiritual awakening. Binging on Abraham Hicks, LOA, Bob Proctor, Dr. Wayne Dyer, hiding in the bathroom at work long enough to squeeze in a quick Gabby Bernstein meditation, and allowing for massive shifts to take place in my life. I was craving Peace of Mind on the deepest level.
Fast forward 3 years and profound spiritual and personal growth....yet here it was, that oh so familiar feeling of anxiety driven failure that I couldn't pay my mortgage. But this time.. this time was different. I stepped outside of my human experience long enough to see what was truly happening. I don't believe in the " Universe is testing me", I do believe the Universe in its infinite wisdom will recognize when you're ready to UPGRADE. This was a pivotal moment and I had two clear choices.... either fall back into victim mode at the mercy of my own self-limiting beliefs, or give gratitude for this pattern that is resurfacing and choose a different reaction..a stronger more aligned vibration. Oh the BLISS when you can honor your pattern that comes up and move through it in an enlightened way that actually serves you on an energetic level. Saying to the Universe, "Thank you for this opportunity to UPGRADE and re-pattern my life...thank you." A massive shift will take place my friend, healing will ensue and waves of gratitude will wash over you!!
This is the Year of Number 11, a Master number in the spiritual world. Master numbers bring higher spiritual purpose and higher frequency. Humanity is awakening at rapid speeds right now.... Have you been feeling it? This rapid awakening gives rise to a lot of upgrading opportunities. It may feel like you're being faced with more significant challenges, but as you recognize these challenges as gifts, you my sister will Rise Up and uncover your true potential here in this lifetime.
As early as this day, make it known to the Universe, yourself and your Higher Self as to what you are ready for.... the true love, the abundance, the trust and forgiveness, and as the opportunities manifest, step into your light and embody the situation in full alignment. You are love, you are light, and you are worthy!!
HO'OPONOPONO my Friend ;)